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Monday, February 28, 2011
Going to the Temple, and We're Going to Get Married
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Sunday, February 27, 2011
Tyler, R.I.P.
For about a week one of my homies toted Tyler the plastic fish around in a glass bowl. Since the bowl was without a lid (How many times must I buy replacement Pyrex?), he would put Tyler in a plastic baggie when we had to go out. He'd slosh him around in water that turned a cloudy, filmy beige by the end of the day. I can't tell you how many times the baggie leaked--in the car, at the basketball game, and during the Pledge at the cub scouts' Blue and Gold banquet.
After about a week of cleaning up after Tyler and moving his lidless bowl around to different places in the kitchen--Tyler's resting place--I told my homie, "I don't like Tyler anymore. He doesn't lower my blood pressure." And he said, "Nothing does." So as I was cleaning the kitchen that night, I murdered Tyler.
When my homie woke up in the morning and found the note and his beloved Tyler, he said, "Tyler's not dead, Mom. See him? He still has one drop of water on him, so he's alive." I smiled and said, "He must be magic."
My homie walked to the water cooler and filled Tyler's bowl, plopping him back into the water just as it neared the brim. He put the bowl back on the counter and gave him some crushed Saltines for fish food.
I let Tyler stay for one more day, then it was over...
Saturday, February 19, 2011
Huffing Sharpies
The above posters are for the song, "The Books of the New Testament," and it's one of my favorite primary tunes. As some of you may know, its melody is the same as "Praise to the Man," also a personal fave.
I decided to outline all the words to the song with a big, fat black sharpie. I want to make sure the boys in the back can see every word. As I outlined all 190 letters, the ceiling fan above my head swirled and spread the fumes throughout our house. My eyes were watering, and I think I was huffing, so Mi Amor called down from the stairs and said, "Are you about done with that thing? It's ridiculous how much time you spend on this stuff." I told him to simmer down and that I only had 5 letters left to outline.
After I finished tracing my letters, I turned up my boom box and sang along to "The Books of the New Testament" about 200 times. I kept getting stuck on the timing for "first and second Corinthians." I think Mi Amor slammed the door on round 7 of my song practice, but I've got the song down pat now.
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