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Last night I asked Bryce, "If you could rate our relationship on a scale of 1 to 10, one being calling it quits time and a ten being time to write a book about how good we are together, how would you rate our relationship?"
Without thinking he said, "9.75."
"Really?" I said, confused. " I was thinking we were at a 5.0, maybe lower."
Previous to last night, an insensitive comment catapulted us into the depths of a five-day long argument. Bouncing blame back and forth night after night, our argument climaxed when I marched into the garage, ready to hop into my car and drive west until I ran out of gas. (I would make Blythe, CA my new home.) But instead of moving out, I marched back into the house, gave him the death stare, and resolved in my mind I would never say another word, ever, until he said: I'm sorry. After all, he was the one who started it. And I was the one who was going to keep it going, and win.
The next day, immediatley as he walked in the front door from work, he said it: "I'm sorry, Katy," his arm outstretched, his hand reaching for me, a peace offering for me to have and to hold.
I kept my distance, standing behind the kitchen counter, and with my arms crossed and hips out I said, "Well, it's going to take more than that to show me you're really sorry. You must also buy me an Easter dress from Banana and a bouquet of flowers from Trader Joe's." I couldn't finish my sentence without smiling.
"Done." He said, willing to do whatever I asked so he could bail himself out of being a POW in his own home.
"Just kidding, Bryce. You know I hate flowers." I said.
He replied, "Whatever you say. I'm only a man trying to do the best I can."
Our fight went on for way too long, and I was the one who kept it going. Although last night's assessment of our relationship was rather generous, our relationship normally hoovers above an 8 most of the time. But due to some recent challenges, it's dipped below our normal, rock-steady score. President Uchtdorf's advice to just "Stop it!" and Bryce's "I'm only a man," confession have inspired me to forgive quicker and let it go. An attitude adjustment/lobotomy might help, too. I'm hoping the next time we rate our relationship, I'll be the optimist and rate us at a 9.99.
P.S. Go here for a free printable of President Uchtdorf's advice.
Marriage is hard, even when you're a 9.75. The photo is a 10.
ReplyDeleteI really like your post Katy :) And I like seeing you smiling at me in Primary.
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