Recipient (mi madre): Hello. We didn't have to identify our household using our last name. My grandmother did that, though. A simple hello was fine.
Caller: Hi. This is Jenny Smith. May I please SPEAK with Madre? The caller must identify him or herself. No ID equals no respect from mi madre. Don't ever ever start a phone conversation with, "Is Madre there?" Mi madre may respond, "Yeah, I'm here. What do you want to do about it?" The words that will spark her heart are, "May I SPEAK with..."
Recipient (mi madre): "This is SHE" or "This is Madre." She'd never say, "This is HER." If she ever makes a phone call, and the recipient responds with a "This is HER," the stars fall out of the sky and that recipient is crowned queen of all ignoramuses. I love that word.
Now I'm grown. I have three kids and mi Amor. We have caller ID, a double-line, 2 cell phones, 5 landline phones, and an answering machine. When the phone rings, my homies race to answer it, and I say, "You'd better not answer that phone unless you're going to answer it properly." They answer it just like I did as a girl. We've practiced and practiced because good phone etiquette makes us look fancy, classy, and refined, almost as refined as mi madre. I heart that woman.